Writers! When self-publishing, polish up your book to look as professional
as possible. When I was starting out, morphing from a playwright to an author, I knew instinctually my first book should look like a traditionally published book where a team of editors and proofreaders (at a publishing house) scoured my book for mistakes, adding appropriate copyright information and acknowledgements, etc.
I brought three of my favorite authors’ books to my desk and copied whatever was in them because I had no help —just like you —but I knew my book should appear professionally presented.
📚 Format That Fails the Basics
Formatting. The importance of justified text—it gives the page clean, crisp edges and a polished appearance. Using a font that is larger than standard, yet not quite “LARGE PRINT.” should be avoided. Font size should stay at 10 or 11.
🖋️ First-Person Fatigue
The choice of tense. First-person narration can work, but be careful that it doesn’t feel like a shortcut. It’s often a sign of lazy storytelling—used to bypass deeper character development or narrative complexity.
📖 Missing Front Matter
The front matter, in a book, is very important. You should furnish copyright information that is found in all books. A list of other titles by the author is a nice touch. Acknowledgements. These omissions will make your book feel unfinished, like a draft rather than a published work.
🧂 Needs More Seasoning
A good thesaurus, by your side is always a good idea.
🙄 Stop Explaining the Joke
You are funny. Your character is funny. No need to “mansplain” your humor and plot points. Trust your readers. They’re smart. They get it.
😰 Anxiety Overload
Jill’s anxiety, a central theme, was hammered home so relentlessly that it became exhausting.
🔁 Redundant Repetition
Repetition was another issue: the author would describe Jill’s emotion or action, then immediately echo it in the next line, as herself. It felt redundant and clunky.
📉 A Weak Ending Wrapped in Explanation
After slogging through the entire book, the final paragraph delivered yet another dose of “mansplaining”—a summation of the story’s lessons, as if the narrative hadn’t made them clear. That kind of wrap-up suggests the story itself wasn’t strong enough to stand on its own.
🌐 Website Placement Misfire and Typo Trouble
And finally, as the story closes on the last page, the author tacked on her website address—without ceremony or formatting. Typically, this kind of promotional link belongs on a separate page, ideally paired with a graphic or call-to-action that feels intentional.
To make matters worse, there was a typo: “Visit Rachel’s store at store. Rachelhannaauthor.com.” That stray period and awkward phrasing made it feel rushed and unprofessional—like an afterthought rather than a curated invitation.
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TS. Now that the traditional publishers have turned you down, file away that rejection letter, soothe your fragile writer’s ego with a hot cup of tea, some chocolate, or whatever and self-publish your play.
It’s important to know that the correct way to format a stage play for submitting (to a publisher, agent or theatre) is very similar to the format used when publishing it. Below is a sample of the correct formatting.
List of Characters: I noticed that in the Dramatists Play Service scripts, they do not list the ages of the characters. I know from experience that a director wants to have this information immediately when choosing a play. What if they don’t have an eighty-year old, male who can act? Make-up can only go so far! Ethnicity is rarely listed but there are exceptions. But, generally, no. What if the director has a different vision for casting?
Sample:
CAST OF CHARACTERS (Place on the 3rd or 4th page after title, playwright’s name, Copyright notices.etc.)
CAST OF CHARACTERS (centered.)
Emma ~~ A young earthling girl
Stare ~~ A rhetorical owl
Donald ~~ A young fairie
Cheets ~~ a rambunctious elf
Patsy ~~ A large banana spider
Agnes & Annie ~~ the sister Aardvarks
Thomas ~~ the sea-faring sea turtle
Bertie ~~ the resident reading teacher
(EMMA and MRS. MOSEYALONG are sitting together on the grass. The PUPPIES are rolling around, play fighting, in the grass as puppies do. CHEETS is trying to get into the play. AGNES and ANNIE sit across from THEM reading THEIR book on Australia.)
MRS. MOSEYALONG
Let me assure you, Emma, we hunt and eat impala, Thomson’s gazelle and common wildebeest. Also, smaller animals such as dik-dik and warthogs.
CHEETS (Stopping HIS play with the PUPS.)
That’s a funny word. Dik-dik. (Demanding.) Cheets wants to know what it means.
EMMA
Manners, Cheets. Perhaps you could ask Mrs. Moseyalong about dik-diks.
CHEETS
Cheets wants to know about dik-diks.
STARE
Who?
(EMMA sighs.)
MRS. MOSEYALONG
It’s all right, Emma. Sometimes my pups can be very rude. (To Cheets.) Dik-diks are a small antelope. We don’t hunt Aardvarks. We find their meat far too fatty.
AGNES (Over-hearing.)
I beg your pardon. We are not fatty. Really! Annie, did you hear what that dog said about us?
ANNIE
Oh, I don’t think she meant⸺
MRS. MOSEYALONG (Speaking simultaneously.)
I didn’t mean⸺
AGNES
Really! The nerve of some dogs.
MRS. MOSEYALONG (Turning back to Emma and Cheets.) Dik-dik live in the bushland of Africa. Sadly, they are being driven to extinction in some parts of our homeland. We try to eat other things.
PATSY (Knitting her web furiously.)
Iii–Eee! Los pequeños, los cachorros! Mrs! Your children are destroying my web. Mira! See what they have done.
(Slowly rising, SHE crosses to where HER pups are bumping into the lower strands of Patsy’s web. SHE growls once deep in HER throat.)
MRS. MOSEYALONG
Grrrrrr⸺
(The PUPS instantly stop THEIR play and run to THEIR mother’s side, whining and kissing HER face.)
MRS. MOSEYALONG
I apologize, Miss Patsy. My pups are careless but mean no harm.
PATSY
Dios mío, qué molestia! My beautiful web. Now I will have to repair. Go away! I am very⸺how you say⸺ocupada.
(MRS. MOSEYALONG leads HER litter to the other side of the glen, where EMMA is sitting. ROGER, JAX and SERENGETI pile into EMMA’s lap and EMMA falls back in the grass, laughing. FERGUS and DONALD enter.)
MRS. MOSEYALONG
Good morning, Sir Fergus, Mr. Donald. (Turning to her pups.) Quiet down, children.
(The PUPPIES, stop their wrestling atop EMMA and sit at attention watching the adults. EMMA sits up.)
EMMA
Good morning. Sir Fergus, did you rest well?
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You are funny. Your character is funny. No need to “mansplain” your humor and plot points. Trust your readers. They’re smart. They get it.
The Deep South Trilogy
Mother Mac’s Boarding House
